The Giver

Giving of time.

Giving of money.

Giving of talents.

In my daily work throughout the community, I see the reluctant giver. I see the authentic giver--- the one who often doesn't have much but gives anyway. I see the spectrum of means and willingness to let go of those resources for others.

I think one of the most powerful lessons I ever had in giving came from my Aunt--- Sister Mary Walker.

Sister Mary, a Dominican nun, spent her vocation as an elementary school teacher in Detroit. Everyone knew Sister Mary by her laugh, hug, and generosity. At 4' 11", she was a busy and tall force to reckon with ---- in a good way. Mary asked my brother to wire a wood block to the gas peddle on her car so she could reach it. He often laughed later that she never asked for a block on the brake peddle! She was always on the go in serving others.

She played a special role in my life because she came and lived with our family of six shortly after my mother had passed away in 1973.

When Mary died several years back, I remember during the eulogy how everyone spoke about what she had given them or taught them. She was a giver. Mary was a giver of self---a giver of hand crafted goods---a giver of a listening ear.

After the service, a close friend of Mary came up to each of her nieces and nephews and said, "we have gathered all of Mary's belongings and she asked if each of you would take one for yourself."

I remember turning the corner at the doorway and seeing ALL of Mary's belongings. Her entire life possessions fit on two small card tables. Nothing on the table carried much monetary worth --- a scarf, watch, and the like. I chose a small wooden box. The box today remains for me a simple reminder that life is more about how we treat others than what we accumulated along the way.

By any measure, Sister Mary Walker had nothing. No money. No fine material goods. Yet, one of her core legacies was---"Mary as a giver." After she lost her sight and was no longer able to do her passion of sewing, she said, "well at least I can become even a better listener for others."

I often think of Mary. I think of the legacy we each create in the wake of our life. Am I the reluctant giver. Or am I an authentic giver. Mary inspires me to work every day to be the later.

The best way to thank the person in your life that taught you the importance of giving is to model it so others can learn from you. Who is that person in your life?

Thanks for reading. Pass it on.